Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Sermon on the Mount: Addendum

An addendum to Matthew's Sermon on the Mount (Matt 5-7) has been discovered in the American South! Translation from the Greek:

And after all he had spoke he said unto them, "Verily I say unto you, gird up your loins with weapons lest your government oppress thee with taxation and environmental regulation. Careth not about the rich man, for his wealth shall trickle down to you unfettered. Protect thou the fetus of thy womb; yet after birth ye shall wash your hands of them. Be kind only to thy countrymen, for your place of origin is the kingdom of heaven. Despiseth thou those who speak ill against you for your beliefs, for their ears will not hear regardless of the volume of thy words and forcefulness of thy arguments. (Do not letteth that stop you, however.) And above all, a new law I give to you: marriage in the eyes of the state shall be only between one man and one woman, lest I come down and smite thee with floods, famine, and activist judges."

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